Thursday, March 31, 2011

Logic, Argument And Theology

In relation to my previous post read these Twenty Arguments For The Existence Of A Supreme Being and have a bit of a laugh. I apologize for the uneven and untidy spacing. Try as I might it just wouldnt go the way I wanted it. Perhaps someone ‘up there’ was annoyed.

1. TRANSCENDENTAL ARGUMENT, a.k.a. PRESUPPOSITIONALIST (1) If reason exists then God exists. (2) Reason does exist. (3) Therefore, God exists.

2. COSMOLOGICAL ARGUMENT, a.k.a. FIRST CAUSE ARGUMENT (1) If I say something must have a cause, it has a cause. (2) I say the universe must have a cause. (3) Therefore, the universe has a cause. (4) Therefore, God exists.

3. ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (I) (1) I define God to be X. (2) Since I can conceive of X, X must exist. (3) Therefore, God exists.

4. ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (II) (1) I can conceive of a perfect God. (2) One of the qualities of perfection is existence. (3) Therefore, God exists.

5. MODAL ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (1) God is either necessary or unnecessary. (2) God is not unnecessary, therefore he must be necessary. (3) Therefore, God exists.

6.ARGUMENT FROM DESIGN, a.k.a. GOD OF THE GAPS, a.k.a. TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (I) 1) Check out the world/universe/giraffe. Isn't it complex? (2) Only a supreme being could have made them so complex. (3) Therefore, God exists. 7. ARGUMENT FROM BEAUTY, a.k.a. DESIGN/TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (II) 1) Isn't that baby/sunset/flower/tree beautiful? (2) Only a loving creator could have made them so beautiful. (3) Therefore, God exists. 8. ARGUMENT FROM MIRACLES (I) (1) My aunt had cancer. (2) The doctors gave her all these horrible treatments. (3) My aunt prayed to God and now she doesn't have cancer. (4) Therefore, God exists. 9. MORAL ARGUMENT (I) (1) Person X, a well-known atheist, was morally inferior to the rest of us. (2) Therefore, God exists. 10. MORAL ARGUMENT (II) (1) In my younger days I was a cursing, drinking, smoking, gambling, child- molesting, thieving, murdering, bed-wetting bastard. (2) That all changed once I became religious. (3) Therefore, God exists. 11. ARGUMENT FROM INTIMIDATION, a.k.a. TOMAS DE TORQUEMADA'S ARGUMENT (1) See this bonfire? (2) Therefore, God exists. 12. ARGUMENT FROM NUMBERS (1) Billions of people believe in some sort of supreme being. (2) They can't all be wrong, can they? (3) Therefore, God exists. 13. ARGUMENT FROM INCOMPLETE DESTRUCTION (1) A plane crashed killing 143 passengers and crew. (2) But one child survived with only third-degree burns. (3) Therefore, God exists. 14. ARGUMENT FROM POSSIBLE WORLDS (1) If things had been different, then things would be different. (2) That would be bad. (3) Therefore, God exists. 15. ARGUMENT FROM CROCKERY (1) Pots don't go around giving orders to the potter who made them. (2) Therefore, God exists. 16. ARGUMENT FROM CREATIVE INTERPRETATION (1) God is: (a) The feeling you have when you look at a newborn baby. (b) The love of a mother for her child. (c) That little still voice in your heart. (d) Humankind's potential to overcome their difficulties. (e) How I feel when I look at a sunset. (f) The taste of ice cream on a hot day. (2) Therefore, God exists. 17. ARGUMENT FROM POSTMODERNISM (1) I'm going to prove to you that God exists. (2) [Insert any of the other arguments on this page in here.] (3) [Atheist refutes argument.] (4) I cannot prove there is a supreme being any more than anyone of us can prove we really exist in a tangible world. (5) Therefore, God exists.18. ARGUMENT FROM FORTUITOUS COINCIDENCE (1) What are the odds of that happening? (2) Pretty long, I’ll bet. (3) Therefore, God exists. 19. ARGUMENT FROM MYSTERIOUS USE OF PREPOSITIONS (1) It is impossible to disprove God with your puny human intellect unless you are above God. (2) Are you higher than God? (3) I’ll take that puzzled look on your face as a 'No.' (4) Therefore, God (being the highest thing ever) exists. 20. ARGUMENT FROM HURT FEELINGS (1) God exists. (2) [Atheist makes counterarguments.] (3) I am deeply offended that you do not believe what I do. (4) Therefore, God exists.

6 comments:

wisdomgod said...

I laugh reading this.

David (TheDhamma.com) said...

OMG! I mean, Oh my Buddha!

How many logical fallacies are in those arguments! Holy cow!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_logical_fallacies

Ken and Visakha said...

Marvelous! The last one is especially popular in fundamentalist/convservative circles in the US and means that Americans can't even talk freely about the weather nowadays!
Thanks for the timely humor.

yuri said...

This even numerically beats Nagarjuna's arguments against God's existence. Especially convincing is Torquemada's argument! :)

fable said...

This is creatively hilarious,bhante

bob knab said...

greetings ---------------

so this -


a wayfarrer page


EEELLLEEEPPPHHHAAANNNTTT


THERE IS SOMETHING RATHER NOTHING



WHAT EVER IS HERE HAS FOREVER BEN HERE AND IS FOREVER CHANGING



AN ENTITY IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK IT IS NOR ANYTHING YOU CAN IMAGINE IT TO BE



AN ENTITY BECOMES THAT WHITCH YOU BELIVE IT TO BE




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